Sunday, February 08, 2015

The Blossoming of Shaela

It has been way too long since my last post. There have been many developments including Shaela entering into puberty! After much sleuthing and divine guidance,. In October 2014, I tested Shaela for kryptopyrrole disorder, and she was positive. This meant she was urinating out her B6 and Zinc. We immediately put her on higher doses of B6, Zinc, Mn, Biotin and folinic acid (stopped the 5MTHF because of her COMT++ snp). Her whole disposition started to change. She is less anxious, more amiable, able to handle stress much better and is able to be more social with her peers. The B6 is necessary for making neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine. She is learning much more quickly and homework is so much easier for her. Justin is still helping her with homework because she gets triggered when I point out any mistakes. The zinc is necessary for her immune system as well as being able to detoxify heavy metals. I believe she had heavy metals from China and has been now able to detoxify them. I notice days when she needs Molybdenum (also a mineral to detoxify heavy metals and deficient in people who are very sensitive to odors like perfume, like Shaela), she gets a bit livery due to releasing the heavy metals. It is a delicate balance of supplements each morning, trying to address her needs on a daily basis. Thank goodness for muscle testing!

She is becoming the incredible beautiful wonderful girl that she really is, now that her brain is getting the nutrients it needs. To think about 6 months ago, I was so afraid that Shaela was going to have Borderline Personality Disorder. All that fear is completely gone. I really think that a lot of mental illness in people stems from this kryptopyrrole disorder.

Besides being so much easier to live with and love, her brain is changing. She actually several times surprised us by cleaning her activity room thoroughly, throwing things out and organizing. She even cleaned out her probably 60 stuffed animals, sorting them into keep, put in bag for garage and give away. Unheard of! Shaela has been so attached to all her things, this was miraculous. Then recently she folded all her clothes in her closet to perfection and organized them. To be able to organize like this was totally out of the question last year. Again, my fear that she was going to grow up to be a hoarder are also now abated.

What a different life Shaela would have had, if we were not Naturopathic physicians.

We just got a piano, thanks to Nonna's Christmas present. Shaela is joyfully playing pieces like the Entertainer, Tarantella, Titanic, a pop song (Fireworks?) about a plastic bag blowing in the wind, Frozen song, and others. It is truly marvelous and wonderful to hear her play. She is so amazing and gifted. I am in awe when she plays.

She is still wanting to be called “Shaela” and admonishes people when they call her “Shae”. We were in Mexico for a week with Nasha and Steve, in a town called Bucerias. We had a great time, Shaela playing with Veda, her bud. Shaela is also the dog whisperer and made friends with the compound guard dog named Rocky, and a little poodle and a puppy. She was in dog heaven. We ate lots of wonderful seafood and went to the beach everyday. We went to a beautiful island where we had to swim under a cave to get there. When we went back to the boat against the tide, Shaela was holding onto a raft that our guide was pulling. She made me hold onto it too. I let go when the guide was wondering why it was so hard to pull a 9 yo! It is so touching how she wants to take care of me and worries for my health and safety. She has often told me about how she and her husband (yes, she is actually picturing being married in the future! Big change from the past) will be taking care of us. And that she is going to be a billionaire. I don't doubt her. She can do anything she sets her mind on. She has often said that she wished she could be my mother and take care of me, instead of me worrying about her and taking care of her. I tell her that she has been my mother in past lives, and this time it is my turn to take care of her.

Shaela is still extremely sensistive to other people's energy. Being in Mexico, she had a panic attack one night. She woke up (we were in same room) and said she couldn't breathe, her head felt strange, she was dizzy, etc. We made her breathe deeply, slowly, finally turning on the lights, and it went away. It really freaked her out. Apparently, the day before, she had been talking about ghosts with Nasha, and confirmed a cheshire cat like ghost that she and Nasha had seen at different times. Nasha also talked to her about a shapeshifter that she saw while driving and who wanted to hurt her. Shaela worked herself up with fear and had the panic attack.

Shaela was shown the neruoemotional points on her head to rub in case it happened again. Apparently it did happen again two nights ago. I was unusually fast asleep and did not waken. Shaela was able to go through the breathing routine and rubbing the points on her head, turning on the lights and thinking good and funny thoughts. She abated the panic attack. What lessons she is learning! Justin was there for her, as I can't believe I slept through it. I was super tired.
Shaela later told me that Tajali, her sitter, told her when she was scared of ghosts, to say, “hello, my name is Shaela, do you want to be friends?” I thought this was great. Our lives are so not the norm.

Before Mexico, Shaela did 10 sessions of Auditory Integration Technique with Laurie Ross Brennan. This was to help her hyperacoustic ears and nervous system. I believe this auditory processing disorder was created from her early trauma and developmental stages. So when she did the AIT, Shaela had some bad days. It was bringing up some trauma, and we held her with compassion and cleared her as much as we could. So this combined with thinking about Tara and Kobi's mortality, and my Mom getting diagnosed with cancer and then it metastisizing, all contributed to these panic attacks, besides the confirmation of ghosts and ghouls. Shaela is doing fine now, and we told her she knows what to do and we are so proud of her.

Shaela loves dogs and keeps saying she wants 20 dogs when she grows up. I keep telling her of how hard it would be to take care of 20 dogs. We may get another dog after our China trip in July. Tara and Kobi are doing well, they are still able to climb to the top of Mountain View, but Tara is pretty limpy afterwards. They are still the most loveable and amazing dogs.

Shaela is starting to develop. It freaked me out at first, fearing that I was exposing her to too much estrogen or xenoestrogens in plastic, etc. But I think it is just normal, as she is going to be turning 10 in 4 months. I totally resisted reading her a book on sexuality that Lisa Pence had given me. But once I saw that she was developing, I read it to her, skipping certain parts. She is so adamant on not having a baby. I told her if she does not sleep with a boy naked, she would not have a baby. She told me she will not sleep with a boy naked, until she is too old to have a baby. I will explain more details as she gets older. I don't want her to obsess about private parts.

Shaela also has just gotten a dental appliance, an expander, to make her upper palate bigger for her teeth that are coming in. It is a device that you have to turn a key to make it expand little by little. It reminds me of the “rack” a torture table of olden times on the roof of her mouth. We are going slowly as it hurts when it is expanding. All that Shaela has been going through, plus hormones, plus her intense sensitivity to begin with, we are doing the expander as need be, often times skipping the second turn of the key each night.

On a much lighter and joyous note, Shaela is Persophone in the school play this year. She actually has three lines! I am so proud of her participating in the play this year. Last year she played the piano, but was not in the play. She is truly blossoming into a most amazing, loving, beautiful being! She is so looking forward to going to the May Center and leaving LaMariposa. She still has some bad days at school with kids and her teacher. But there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Blessings of Love and Light,

Sunday, June 29, 2014

Added notes

I forgot to add a few notes that happened in 2013-2014 between posts:
Shaela was going through phases of hating her name, so we all were calling her "Shae" instead of "Shaela".  Then she hated "Shae and Shaela and wanted to be called "Sen" after the character in Spirited Away.  We complied and was taught to call her "Sen", even family.  It was very hard to change, and when we forgot, got so much flack and anger from her.  So when we went full force to have her called "Sen" even at school, I told her she had to wear a name tag hanging around her that said "Please call me Sen".  And she had to be patient with friends and teachers in making the change.  As soon as we were prepared to make the change at school, she decided she liked "Shaela" and did not want to be called "Sen", however she now gets mad if you call her "Shae" which I was still conditioned to calling her.  So that is where we are at now....  Justin and I should be sainted.

Shaela had told me that she wanted to come back (be reincarnated) as a ghost and haunt people.  She thinks that would be so fun!

Shaela went to an ice skating birthday party, which she did not want to do for fear of falling and not knowing how to ice skate.  She did so well (I think in large part to rollar skating at Chinese Camp last year) that she wanted to ice skate and do it often.  Well, after the first lesson later, she did not like taking lessons and her enthusiasm waned, but it was fun while it lasted!

Shaela loves bike riding from the Clinic, she loves to read books like Judy Blume and about girls getting into trouble or fighting with others at school.  She also had been making lots of clay figures, bunnie, sealy, caterpiller and puffer.  She is playing and creating beautiful scores on the piano, that she can replay note for note.  In her end of year school play, she played "Swan Lake"  so beautifully.  She only takes some lessons at school with Greg.  We hope to do more next year.

Shaela's favorite movie was Frozen.  She knows the words to the song of Let it Go.  She wanted the doll for her birthday and got one from Nonna.  She tried unsuccessfully to try to teach me the words.  Yikes!

Shaela doesn't wear dresses much, she is all into layers and leggings all the way into the summer.  She likes comfort and to look good.  We have to cut all tags off of her clothes as she is very sensitive (just like her Mom).

Her new haircut is sooooooo cute!!!!!  And so easy to take care of.  No more endless struggles with cream rinse and trying to get all her tangles out.

Life is getting easier!  Blessings to All.
Debbie, Justin, Shaela, Kobi and Tara and fishies

Shaela is Transforming

Shaela is 9!!!
OMG Shaela is growing up so fast! So much has happened and there seems to never be enough time to blog about it. We have taken Shaela to the Gifted Development Center in CO beginning of June. She was tested and found to be gifted. Her verbal understanding and creativity were extremely high. She also was found to have auditory, visual and sensory processing disorders. They also thought she had PTSD, which was the reason for her intense anxiety. They gave us tools to use with her and suggestions for how to handle these disorders at home and school.
This testing was so important for us to understand Shaela's difficulties with clock work, math, and alphabetical ordering and looking up things in a dictionary. She would fight us so hard every day while we tried to help her with her homework. Our sweet family was breaking down and disintegrating into tears and anger everyday. Now we have more compassion and understanding of her situation and can help her better.

We then went to Able Kids Foundation in Ft Collins, CO to have her auditory processing assessed. This is the only place in the world that does this kind of assessment. It was fascinating. We found that Shaela's hearing is excellent, but she has little to no filters. It is like being able to have super hearing abilities, without being able to discern what is important or not. She hears speaking and shuffling papers as the same importance in her brain. This has been causing so much distress and overload in her poor little nervous system. That is probably why she has hated school and cannot make friends. When two people were speaking she hears it all jumbled. We had a filter made for one ear, and it is working wonders so far!

Shaela started her summer off in Film making camp. We thought she might like this since she is always making films in her head. Unfortunately, she did not want anything to do with the camera and making special effects. (this may be due to her visual processing disorder, so we didn't press). She was fortunately able to switch into the art camp, where she was very happy drawing and making creative art pieces. She still complained every day and was pretty negative.

The second week, we had gotten the ear filter and had also seen Lee Cartwright, a shamanic healer who had worked on Shaela's shattered etheric spine from Day 2 trauma. Shaela was in the Big Sky Science Camp making a large robot. She had the best week ever! The camp is set up with great and sweet counselors and is very safe feeling. Shaela at first was very worried about toxic smells and fumes (they had gone through safety training and told the kids not to inhale the fumes from soldering). Even though there was a girl from her school who was making mean faces at her, she did not obsess much (only mentioned it 5 or so times then let it go), and made several friends. She was as surprised at this as we were, wondering if it was the filter. We think she can hear better now and is not misinterpreting people like she had been. She would always think that people were talking badly about her and feel so outcast. She even had a misunderstanding when she heard a girl saying “I don't like you...” She asked the girl if she had said this, and the girl responded “no, I said I don't like when you do this....” the misunderstanding was cleared up and Shaela was relieved. It is like a miracle to have this kind of dialogue and interaction. In the past, Shaela would think she heard something and would react so vehemently and remain angry for weeks, obessing and not letting it go. Shaela actually said she like camp and was looking forward to more. She even said last night, that she is so happy because she “fits in now”. Something is definitely shifted. We are so greatful.

With her new found self, we went to get haircuts yesterday. She wants to look like Jade in Jackie Chan cartoons (the ones my brother does voice overs for). I told her that Jade's hair is short and wanted her to know this since she has been wanting to grow her hair out forever. She also has been having a hard time combing her hair, as it gets extremely tangled and gnarly with just sleeping on it. She decided she would get it cut, and thank goodness, she loves it! She got an angle cut and she looks adorable. She was so pleased that she said to me, “I am usually so hard on myself, so when I say I look good, people will think I look great!” She is so astute. She is so hard on herself and wanting to look a certain way and being dissatisfied with certain aspects of her self. This was another great moment.
Shaela (she hates being called Shae now!) wanted to be called Jade in camp, so they all called her this. At one point she had seen a girl from Oceanna's camp, Dragonfly, from last summer. She asked the girl if she knew a Shaela from that camp. The girl said yes. Shaela asked her if she liked her. The girl said “yes (Shaela was surprised), but sometimes she would get really angry.” Shaela than replied, “if you get to know her you would really like her, she is my cousin.”
She asked if I could let her be called “Kiera” for the Dragon Fly camp this year. She loves to pretend she is a different person with people, I am not sure why. Whether it is fooling people or pretending to be different, it may work itself out, as she emerges into herself and feels more confident.

For her 9th birthday, she had planned on having only adult friends. It was the best and least stressful birthday party yet. She knew from two years ago when she had a kid party, and one little girl melted down after the cake pops and threw a fit and ruined Shaela's fun, that she never wanted this again. She wanted a dinner party where people dressed up, and then later went to the hot tub and looked at stars. We did just that. It was fantastic. It also helped that we had Nasha and Steve there to help up cook and clean (everyone helped as well). Shaela even had her friend Marilyn come, who drove from Colorado to attend the festivities. I have never seen Shaela so mature and wonderful with all the company. In the past she would get jealous if I helped guests or asked them if they needed anything. She did not exhibit any of this that day. She opened her gifts and was so poised and gracious with each one. I was so impressed.

Shaela has been seeing angels, fairies and entities. I believe she can see these things from my understanding and verification through muscle testing and clearing. Obviously, I don't like when she sees entities and we clear them out fairly often. So we are enlisting the help of a ghost buster who clears homes, people and pets and land. She will be coming this morning and I am very interested in what she will find.

So much great information and such great happenings.
Sending lots of Love and Light to all those that are still reading this.
Debbie and Justin

Thursday, August 01, 2013

Opportunity for Healing Oppositional Defiance

We have started a new therapist for Shaela, who seems to be right on target and brilliant.  I am so relieved.  As she gets Shaela and her ways after the first visit, and sees that we are in a quandry with our parenting skills in addressing some of her behaviors, she deftly gives us the tools that will hopefully unblock the looping that is going on and creating so much frustration.  Shaela had all the descriptions of oppositional defiance disorder.  Not that I am big on diagnoses and putting people in boxes, but it did give me such a sense of relief to have this therapist describe and understand what Shaela and we are going through.

We begin our journey on correcting this.  We have seen Shaela truly blossoming and doing so well on the supplements we put her on to balance her genetic SNP that affects her ability to make neurotransmitters.  But we had still been getting stuck in the negativity looping and the constant small battles throughout the day.  It was wearing on us all.  I am so hopeful.  The stars seem to be aligning.

Last night, as Shaela was crying and upset that I am leaving for a week long trip to Alaska with my sister Sue, we talked about transitions and how hard they were for her.  I muscle tested that a lot of this fear stemmed from her birth transition.  We did some clearing.  When I went to go get her a supplement to help her calm her mind, I came back and found her in a much different state. She was calm and almost serene.  She said for a moment she felt like she didn't have a body, that she didn't exist.  I muscle tested that she had revisited the moments before coming into her body.  This is the moment before the initial trauma (a place we bring people to when we do our trauma release work).  It was pretty amazing talking to her about this.  Then of course in a few minutes, she came back to being sad about me going away, but she said she wasn't as sad anymore...  Pretty awesome.  Shaela is so amazing, she is getting things that most adults never experience or understand.  It is so fun to be able to talk to a child about past lives, monkey minds, preconception, sensing what her body needs and wants, etc.  She is still on a "no sugar" diet because she knows her body doesn't want it.  How amazing is that?!

So I believe Shaela can do anything and everything she sets out to do.  She is learning the times table right now.  It was hard for her to do it at first and she gave me all sorts of opposition, but once she sees that she can learn it, she is so excited and proud!  That is worth it. 

I love that amazing being!!!

Blessings of Love and Light,

Monday, July 15, 2013

First teeth extraction

Oh, the joys of parenthood.  Seeing my sweet girl writhing in a dental chair, suppressing her crying and intense fear as her dentist prepared to wiggle her lower canines (not due to be coming out anytime soon), after injecting her twice with novacaine, and she felt it.  She still felt the pain.  I saw the trauma in her eyes, the betrayal, the fear.... I couldn't take it, I left my post of holding her hands, and let Dada take her hands as I went to the corner of the room.  I have had too many dental traumas of my own to help.  Was I making it worse as I was squirmish of the whole procedure as well?  She surived after an hour of stopping and starting again.  We finally had to use the nitrous oxide gas.  All went well, once the dentist realized, he just had to go for it, despite her protests, to do it quickly.  It is over, she is fine.

She is amazing.  She can spell "insubordination" now.  About 2 months ago she realized with joy that she can read!  Her confidence is growing and Shaela seems more happy than angry.  I think the 5 MTHF and B12 we have put her on, after finding out she has a homozygous methylation SNP is helping her make needed neurotransmitters.  We started her on this regime around June.  It has helped her regain more control over her emotions.  When she starts to spin because of her "monkey mind" we give her a dose of glycine, which seems to help.  She likes having control over her monkey mind.  She still has a tendency to be very negative, but not "out-of control" negative like she used to be.  Her happy side is wonderful and so playful.  She still hates transitions but is able to adjust much better than before.

Shae is in Dragonfly Art Camp this summer.  She loved her first week learning about Greece.  She wants a huge column so badly.  She has made extraordinary things already: wove a beautiful basket, did plaster etching, wax painting, knitted a hat (so cute on her!), made a necklace, birdhouse, etc.  She made a hairband out of a single blue gray piece of yarn, that she was so excited about, making sure it looked just right.  She is making some friends, but still has a tendency to want to make someone the "bad guy" or her enemy.  She learned how to "reset" a relationship from Julie, her wonderful OT.  This gave her such confidence as well, to go from despising or being in fear of a failed friendship to making friends again.

Shaela is growing like a weed or well nourished kid.  Everytime people see her, even after a few weeks, they notice how much she has grown.  I am buying her ladies size 1 shoes now ( a bit loose).  She eats like an adult and has been on a no sugar kick after her birthday.  She is a bit paranoid about getting sick, but it has made her so compliant about eating good foods and taking care of herself.  I thought I was making her paranoid, but found out through her teacher that they had a germ/handwashing lesson, where they were looking at their hands before and after handwashing.  The kids were also taking samples from around the classroom and looking at the bugs under a microscope.  It made me feel so much better.

We celebrate her amazing growth and am so relieved to find some relief to her neurochemical imbalances!

Love and Light, 
Debbie, Justin and Shaela and Kobi and Tara

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

The Blossoming of Shaela

Shaela is shedding her outer hull.  With the start of Behavioral Optometry sessions with Dr. Berne, Shaela seems to be going into deep work releasing her abandonment issues.  Dr. Berne noted that many of her infant reflexes were either still here or not functioning appropriately.  That she needed to do some exercises to help her integrate her brain and that things may come up for her.  And yes, they immediately did.  Shaela has been angry, very angry.  When we muscle test, it is her infant self who is angry at her birth mother.  We talk about it, she feels it and we process it using various techniques that I use on my patients.  After which, she lets go of the rage and then reconnects with so much love.  She is amazing.  I am here for her in so many ways.  I feel so blessed to have the skills in which to help her and so blessed that she can go the distance and is so mature enough to do so and to understand.  She is extraordinary.

On a lighter note, Shaela is losing so many of her baby teeth (probably not a coincidence the timing of it all).  She has the cutest smile without her front teeth, but her adult teeth come in immediately behind the loss and her smile changes daily.  She is still enjoying karate and may get her orange belt soon.  Although she still hates and fights transitions and tells us each time we pick her up for karate that she doesn't want to go.

We had a nice holiday with my family, but unfortuately, James, Doug and Ben did not come.  James had broken his clavicle in two places, while celebrating his 50th in Mexico.  Shaela was the only kid amongst a sea of adults.  She used this opportunity to create shows on the stage of the Ranch house.  She got all of us (excluding Nonna, YeYe and Zia, who were the audience), to perform her lines and act in her play.  It was wonderful.  She is quite a director!  She made "experiments" with Auntie Ali, mixing baking soda, raw egg, vinegar and whatever else they found.  She was in Heaven.  And she didn't want to leave.  She gets sad and depressed at each transition.  Again, her lesson in letting go is intense.

Many blessings to whoever is still reading this.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

7 is an Extraordinary Year!!!
Boy, I can't believe how time is flying by.  I have to write all that has transpired this year before too much passes and I forget.

Shae is growing so fast, she has lost 4 teeth already and each has been replaced just as quickly.  She started Karate class in mid September, where Tyler and Dylan go.  Sensei Steve is a wonderful teacher and has a great way with the kids, making jokes and very engaging.  Shae has really taken to it quickly, especially after I donned my old ghee and got hers (Double Take) on with our old white belt, and we practiced before she actually started.  She is a natural with amazing side kicks.  She kicks higher than anyone in her class.  And boy is she cute in that ghee! 

There are all ages and degrees of kids in her class (9 and younger mostly).  She has been helped by many (mostly boys) kids who are higher degree belts, which she seems to enjoy (more added incentive).   When she first started, she wanted to be the "most degree black belt" and would talk about doing karate and becoming the best.  She wanted to then come back and wear her white belt and fool everyone.  We talked about people in China that were so good, that they could practically fly.  This really got her attention.  She kept asking me who was the best at it.  I had no idea, the only name that came out was Genghis Khan.  She grabbed onto this name and wanted to know more.  I told her he wast the greatest conquerer but didn't think he was a martial artist.  Not wanting her to think he was a hero, I told her he probably wasn't liked because he had killed so many people and wasn't very nice.  She asked me if she was Genghis Khan in a past life, I told her I didn't think so, and muscle tested "no".  Later that evening she came up to me and told me that she thought she had killed Genghis Khan in a past life, that she was a girl and had a sword.  I laughed and said I didn't know how he died, but would look it up.  When we googled it, I was shocked.  It said the following:

 Wikipedia says : "On August 18, 1227, during his last campaign with the Western Xia Empire of the Tanguts, Genghis Khan died. The reason for his death is uncertain. Many assume he fell off his horse, due to old age and physical fatigue; some contemporary observers cited prophecies from his opponents. The Galician-Volhynian Chronicle alleges he was killed by the Tanguts. There are persistent folktales that a Tangut princess, to avenge her people and prevent her rape, castrated him with a knife hidden inside her and that he never recovered."

I muscle tested and it was affirmative.  My daughter had killed the Greatest Conquerer of the World!!!  Everything was making sense.  Here was a huge puzzle piece that had beleaguered and scared me until the truth was revealed.  Shae at 4 years old was drawing Word Girl holding a knife between peoples legs.  I showed this to her therapist who was concerned but had a wait and see attitude.  Shae has always been so filled with rage and fights vehemently for any slight injustices.  A mean look, someone making fun of a friend;  she would want to kill that person.  I was very concerned because her rage would take over and she would often lose control and probably scare a lot of people.  She was having difficulty maintaining friendships from one day to the next.  This past life explained everything.  I told her in this life she could let go of feeling like she did in that life, people were not out to harm her, she did not have to "kill Genghis Khan".  In this lifetime, she could enjoy it and feel safe and learn how to forgive people.  Something clicked inside her, she had a big relief of knowing why she held so much anger inside her (previously, she would get angry at herself after and episode and not know why this rage overtook her).  A huge layer was lifted off her.  She could now be softer.

 In conjunction with this knowledge,  she started to understand boys and how they may tease her at school but really like her.  Before if they made a face, she would be infuriated and hate them and want to kill them.  Now, she wondered why they like her.  And it seemed like a lot of boys liked her.  Karate really helped her see boys differently as they are all helpful and not at all disdainful.

For Historical Halloween, she had to be a famous historical artist.  Knowing Shae, I tried to find a woman artist who looked good, but I wanted to see if there was a Chinese female artist. I couldn't find any online. There were none in the library, but we got a name from a librarian "Pan YuLiang".  We looked her up and saw she did a lot of nudes.  Justin wasn't crazy about that, he wanted Shae to pick someone by their art first.  I knew Shae would want to pick them by their beauty.  We were going to Denver to be with family and BBBY, so we would ask my brother-in-law Tom, who was a curator at the Denver Art Museum for Chinese Art.  He told us that he had a woman coming to speak who was the authority on Pan YuLiang.  We were thrilled and started to look her up online.  It turns out she was one of the first females to go to art school and then to travel and study in Paris.  There were movies and TV series and 2 books written about her life.  It said she was an orphan and left with her uncle at 8 yo and then sold to a brothel, where she met a man who became her benefactor and she his concubine.  It was quite a story.  I wasn't sure how Shae would tell it or if we would gloss over some of these facts.  I did muscle test that Shae was her in a past life, so I wanted to buy the book and see the movie to understand more.
When we went to the talk, we found out that the book that the movie and hype was based on, was fabricated.  She was not a prostitute, but fell in love with a man who was a high ranking rebel.  She was an extraordinary painter, sculptor who studied in Paris and combined Western techniques with Eastern ink painting.  She was very suspicious and didn't trust art dealers and was so prolific in her art, she died with 4,000 pieces.

This explained another problem that we had been having this summer.  Shae would come home from camp with a grocery bag full of "projects" and "work".  Shae has always been so prolific.  The activity room was becoming like something out of a hoarding show.  No one, not even Shae wanted to go in there.  I was getting very cranky and overwhelmed by it all.  I finally broke down and told the family we were all going to clean it up.  We did.  But I was still concerned about her "hoarding" tendencies.  Now I understood and it has not been too much of a problem.

I am beginning to understand some deep issues that we can release from Shae and myself.  It has brought us so much closer.  The things a mother fears can drive a wedge between her and her daughter, the beginnings of that wedge, have now disappeared.  Thank goodeness!

The last bit of info, Gluten free.  We have been gluten free for over a year (or two?).  Shae still gets cravings but is so knowledgeable and knows it hurts her brain.  She wishes that gluten and sugar were good for you.  But recently she had a pretzel that was gluten containing, she had some belly aches and then two days later caught a bad bug that was going around.  She had diahrrea for 4 days straight.  She would have intense cramping and then explosive diarrhea.  It was miserable.  No one slept well.  After it was all over, and we could finally eat out.  Shae told me that she looks at gluten and thinks "boogers", so she won't want it (we had just passed a tray of cookies and pastries).  I was so impressed by her trying to create a negative association with gluten to resolve her wanting it.

Oh, yeah, this extremely talented girl is playing the piano like nobody's business, not having any lessons, she is composing songs for her movies.  She is writing books nonstop, and now she can read them!  She has always written books, even before she could write letters, and then before she could write words.  There is so much coming out of her.  Her creativitiy shows no bounds.  She is so extraordinary!  I feel so blessed and so proud of her.  She is now really proud of herself too.  How wonderful!

Much Love and Light to anyone still reading this blog.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Shae Shae update March 2012

It has been a year since my last posting. Shaela’s adamant rejection of her name has created a compromise where we are now calling her “Shae Shae” or “Shae” for short. She occasionally lapses into her vehement attacks on “Shaela Mayla” who gets stuck in spider webs, is often “Fat Shaela Mayla” or has terrible things done to her and getting all her friends to say that they don’t like “Shaela Mayla.” But these pretend fantasies are thank goodness getting less and less so.

Quick update on the past year. In April 2011, we traveled to Las Vegas, NV for my father’s birthday party. In June, we went to Laguna for Father’s Day and to celebrate Shae’s 6th b-day with cousin Patrick (5) and Aunt Michelle’s b-days. Then after coming home, my knee gave way and I had torn my Left medial and lateral meniscus and tore my ACL. I was wheelchair bound/crutches bound and not using my left leg. My surgery was a month later, July 19th. So Shae’s b-day party which was at our house was saved by Grandma and Grandpa being there! Shae went with them during the week of my surgery which was such a blessing. I had a rough time with the anesthesia and had to be admitted to the hospital. Recovery was quick by most other standards but long for me. I had to be on oxygen and a passive motion machine and pain killers. I was out of it for a month. Shae was scared at first, thinking that I was going to die. The summer was a blurr and difficult.

September, Shae starts 1st grade with some time in the afternoon with her kindergarten class. La Mariposa Montessori and its teachers have taken special interest in Shae. We are so appreciative and blessed. Her teachers love sharing her in both classes. She is so bright and learns in the morning her school work, and is developing her social skills in the afternoon. She is enamored with a colleague, Azure, who she talks about everyday. If she and Azure get into a fight, she dreads going to school the next day until she sees him and he gives her a big hug. She is so afraid on not being loved.

Thanksgiving we spent in Hawaii with Grandma and Grandpa and cousin Alec (who we all met for the first time) with Uncle Chris and Aunt Darlene. Alec who has ADHD, is so entertaining for Shae, she has the best vacation ever! Nothing will compare to this special relationship she has garnered.

Christmas was spent in Los Angeles with cousins Benj, Sophia and Patrick and my side of the family, sans Sue, Mom and Dad. Shae does not have a great time as the boys, Patrick and Benj are now bonding more and Sophia likes to play with herself. Shae yearns for cousin Alec and Hawaii. Thank goodness the last 2 days, she has some time to rebond with Benj.

January 2012- we start allowance for “chores” including getting ready in the morning, making her bed, picking up toys and clothes, setting the table, feeding the fish, being kind to everyone, etc. This results in a wonderful change in Shae. I no longer have to harass her to get ready everyday, which was quite draining. She often times wakes up and gets all ready on her own, beating all of us! Her whole disposition has changed and our relationship is so much lighter and joyful. She also is learning about money, saving and spending (she hasn’t spent any of it yet). She wants to save up enough money to get a king size Chinese red silk comforter (Big Ah Ah). We told her it would cost around a thousand dollars. So she is weighing her options wisely when it comes to frivolous toys etc.

Recently, Shae has been non-stop creating. She is making books and writing stories on her own. She is painting, doing a lot of ceramics: bunnies, turtles, elephants, bones, walrus, wig, flowers, bowls, dog, etc. She is an incredible artist and has also been dabbling in music with Uncle Steve. She is able to form relationships with our male friends, which she was very tentative before. She is always asking us to invite Ricky and Alex to her birthday party. She is really starting to read. It is such a great time. Things are opening up to her and she is feeling more confident. She mentors the little ones in the kindergarten class and is setting a good example.

Recent Funny events:

  1. Shae had a shocked and surprised voice when I took out the ironing board for the first time in years, saying, “what is that!?” Obviously, we don’t iron much at our house.

  2. Shae takes awhile to fall asleep after we tuck her in for the night. She often sings or talks to herself (sometimes we catch her playing with her toys). The other day I was telling her that I usually fall asleep right away, after I lie down. She was totally shocked and wondered how I do that. She couldn’t believe that, it was such a foreign concept.

  3. Some how we got on the topic of dying (she is always talking about death or disease or something gruesome). She said that she didn’t want to come back (be reincarnated), but wanted her spirit to haunt people. She thought that would be a lot of fun!

  4. Shae is enamored with the longest words. She has been hooked on “insubordination”, which came up in our reading of the “Little Prince”. It is so funny her telling everyone that “insubordination is her favorite word. This morning we were talking about FOS or fructooligosaccharides. I am trying to make that her favorite word now, since it is longer.

To anyone still reading our blogs, thank you and many blessings,

Debbie, Justin and Shae